I think I’m Out of Juice: One Side of the Story

Here's one side of the story

 I think it’s a good idea to give at least part of the story. There are many reasons why I’ve not been myself on the blog. My mind is clogged with “stuff”. I have a business research paper to write – and to do that I have read, read then investigate, read then draw some insightful conclusions from my findings. In a strange way, I’m looking forward to it, discovering my appetite increasing with every new thing I read (ok it’s not that strange if you know me at all). I’m also chewing over some interesting projects at work- that coupled with my increased commute to and from work (went from 30 minutes both ways to an hour and a half after I moved home in December). That’s one side of the story.


It’s fair to say that I have therefore found myself “out of juice”. I occasionally have a fragment of a blog post idea but it flutters away by the time I get to my screen. On rare occasions, I articulate a small fraction of what I mean – then with a tinge of disappointment (I actually squeeze my nose as if there’s a bad smell), I post it. Perhaps the other side of the story is that I don’t have much to say anymore but I’m hoping that’s not the case. Have I bled myself dry of sensible and senseless posts and now in a decline into nothing and nothingness? It certainly sounds like it to me.


In any case, I won’t give up just yet. I’ll give myself time to do this “famous” research paper. I’ll recover from using 10% of my daily waking hours to drive – or maybe I just suck it up and get used to it (it’s not that bad, Londoners have it much worse). The driving hours may even do me good. Ideas tend to come on that long narrow country road. I’ve toyed with the idea of a voice recorder to capture my fleeting thoughts whether it’s the gospel or rubbish. Although, doing that as I drive may will be a driving hazard. Sigh.


What I’m really trying to say is if you don’t see me around there often, I definitely not dead – just in over my head. At least, you know one side of the story. Hopefully, the other side will be just as plausible.

The end of an era

I always try to write once a week but this week has been very busy. As I write this, I’m sitting in a restaurant at London Heathrow Airport hoping that my meal turns up before my flight begins to board. This weekend I attended my last lecture at the business school I’m studying at. After almost 3 years, I would imagine many felt relief. Some voiced concerns about what they might do next to fill the void.

I’m not sure what I’m feeling. It’s not completely over yet as there’s still a research dissertation to submit. I sense that I will feel empty as I always do at the end of any task, relationship or phase in life. I feel a little uncertainty but strangely confident about the future. Undertaking this degree is the best thing I ever did for myself. That it is coming to an end is evidence that I persevered and fulfilled my goal. I hope that in time I will celebrate that.

My club sandwich is here. Thanks for reading.

Tips for the confused jobist

It’s taken ages to decide what I want to be when I grow up. I read engineering at school but never quite fit in. At the same time, I never really knew what I wanted to do instead. When people asked me, ‘So what do you want to do?’,  it was always answered with a silly, confused expression.

But that’s changed in the past year. After starting my MBA (something I knew I wanted to do), I continuously made mental notes of areas that I found particularly interesting. Then I went off and did my research, which was something like:

  1. Identify area of interest e.g. marketing, web design, personnel management e.t.c.
  2. Act as a job seeker and SEARCH for roles in that area (the internet, job boards and social networking sites like LinkedIn are great for this).
  3. Take note of the JOB DESCRIPTION (what you’d be expected to do and be responsible for) Is it still of interest? If yes,
  4. Note the SKILLS employers expect from a potential candidate. Do you have them? If no, what can you do to get them? Can you get it in your current role? Should you consider personal development e.g. self-study, taught courses or perhaps a new role that provides such skills?
  5. Consider SALARY expectations. Is it what you thought it was? Is it reasonable such that you can live comfortably on it?
  6. And finally, give yourself a timeline. How long will it take you to get where you want to go? 6 months, 5 years?

Note that it’s okay to take a temporary hit on salary if  long-term, the role provides skills that will get you to the ‘Promise Land’. Money isn’t everything… And remember you are not applying for the roles now. You are just  discovering what opportunities are out there and subsequently setting out a personal plan to be the perfect candidate for the role in X numbers of years.

Now I have a good idea where I want to go and roughly how to get there. It’s made me happier and more confident. And it’s wiped that silly, confused look off my face :).

Blogging Theme Review- Why ‘My Business Addiction’?

You may not have noticed but I think it is fair to say that it’s not just business that I’m addicted to. When I started this blog, the intention was to write about my MBA learning journey and  my take on the business world. Granted-I’ve done a little bit of that. But all in all, business is not such an addiction in itself but more of an aspiration that I’m trying to untangle out of my life, which is my other addiction.

In many ways, this blog has revealed that there’s more to me than I thought. I have written on humor, life, family, friendship as well as business. I’ve put my mind up here and overall I’m pleased with the results. It took a while to relax in order for me to move from a guarded tone to one that let my personality through, even at the risk of dredging up the ‘irrelevant’. So I’d say I’m achieving a significant portion of my initial objective: to record a learning journey. I’ve got to know fellow bloggers and I sincerely hope that they know a little about me too. There’s more to learn and I’m sure there are a lot of things I can do much better. I have time to do this and many more miles before I’m picture perfect, if ever being perfect becomes a real aspiration or worse – an addiction.

Another personal reflection completed…but not quite there

I have an assignment that I’ve been meaning to do for the last few weeks. It’s one of those writing assignments that allow me to conjure brilliant paragraphs of wisdom in my head. This “conjuring” usually happens when I’m cooking or bathing or driving or about to fall asleep. Basically, it’s happening everywhere except in front of my laptop and without a pen in my hand. Classic.

My MBA lecturer asked me to reflect on my learning journey so far. I need to mentally plot my personal progress (or the lack of it) and come to a resolution about where I’m going (or should be going). These things are always difficult and even frightening for me. And it’s not only because it’s a bit eerie fairy (ad hoc, intangible), mystical and without any confirmatory mathematical equations. It’s also because most of the time I’m very busy NOT reflecting. I’m usually running from one place (like work or school runs) to another (like home or grocery shopping). But as much as I’d like to continue complaining about time poverty, I know this assignment is meant for me.

It’s typical that now that I’m in front of my screen, I’m empty as regards any wise words about my personal journey. As I sit thinking, I’m sort of where I planned to be emotionally, mentally and professionally. No. Scratch that. I never knew I’d get to my present self. And it’s a lie to even allude that there was a plan all along. I thought I’d stand in my way and talk myself out of my own prosperity. I thought that I wouldn’t make it to this point in time for it to mean anything. As I reflect on what I wanted
to be when I was young enough to dream, I come up blank. I didn’t want to be anything, not even a princess. I just wanted everyone to like me and I wanted to be whatever they wanted me to be. As long as everyone was happy….

You can guess where that left me: not really knowing what I was about. It was a relief when I realised that I wasn’t stuck and I could be anything I wanted to be. In business. A hard worker. A blogger or writer. A very successful human being. I’ve been doing all my own stunts and I’m still here (scars and all to show for it). My old self would be speechless if she could see me now. She never thought I’d get anywhere close to my potential. The fact that I’m reflecting at all is a great start. I’m very much a doer but hopefully I’m taking the necessary steps to just be although it means taking my eyes off the ball.
Ok, enough of this eerie fairy stuff; back to doing.

End of reflection

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